Finding peace

Life is very crazy right now, some of good, some of it not.  My mind is a mess.  My heart feels heavy.

I recently found out that my Dad's cancer has come back.  I started this blog about a  year and a half ago when he was diagnosed the first time.   It never even crossed my mind that it would come back, and that i'd be writing about "round two."

The details:  his cancer is laryngeal, which means it's on his voice box.  Since the radiation therapy didn't work the first time, they are going to operate.  His surgery is scheduled for next wednesday, Augusta 17th. The doctors will go in there and keep removing layers of his voice box until they think they've gotten it all.

I've realized through these past couple of years of hardship that I tend to praise God for being faithful when things turn out well, and when people are healed.  There's nothing wrong with that, but I also need to remember that God is still faithful even when people aren't healed.  God is still faithful even when things turn out differently then we had hoped.  God is still faithful even when we're begging and crying out to Him to "fix" things.  God's plan is perfect and merciful even if we can't understand how.

For encouragement lately i've been reading Psalm 18.  The whole chapter is good, but this is my favorite part:

Psalm 18:30-32:  This God - his way is perfect; the word of the Lord proves true; he is a shield for all those who take refuge in him.  For who is God, but the Lord?  And who is a rock, except our God?  the God who equipped me with strength and made my way blameless.  

Sometimes I get to the point where it seems like too much to handle, and I question Him.  And then I'm reminded (usually by my husband) that God is there to help carry my burdens.  He's the only one big enough to give me the strength I need.  He's the good and purposeful part of this whole situation.

I share this personal story because 1) I covet your prayers for me, my dad, and my family.  There's nothing more encouraging.  And 2) the more I share this story, hopefully more people will be able to see God's glory.

Pray for the skill and wisdom of the doctors as they operate.
Pray that the doctors won't have to remove all of his voice box, and that my dad will still be able to talk.
Pray for healing for my dad, that this will be the victorious end of his battle with cancer.
Pray against satan's attacks that cause us to doubt.
Pray that the Lord overwhelms my family with His peace.